Question: I am Jewish and considered converting to the Church. How is the separation of converts from their nuclear families justified in the eyes of the Church which views family as such an important institution?
Response: Before I go any further with these statements, I want you to know that in trying to answer these questions of yours, I admit that my opinion is not that important compared to others of your Jewish heritage. So, I have been asking a lot of my Jewish friends and relatives (yes, my sister-in-law is Jewish) how to answer this. These responses aren't just fabrications of my own opinion; they are from Jewish people. I felt that this would give it more credibility and validity.
Among these friends is a woman who lives in Los Angeles. She has given me permission to quote her in this reply. While studying and learning more about the Church, she was torn by the commandment "Honor thy Father and Mother." How could she do that when joining the Church would be going against the wishes of her parents? I quote from her; "I had shamed them, I had committed a grievous crime against 'our People.' But I came to understand that I have 2 families, my earthly parents and Heavenly Parents, and that through learning about the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I discovered that besides having a family on earth, I also have a heavenly family; That I am a child of God and that I lived with my Heavenly Parents before I came to earth, promising Them that I would do all that I could do, to return to Their presence."
"And so by studying, learning and understanding the Plan of Salvation, and by receiving a witness through the Holy Ghost, and what the missionaries were teaching was in fact true, I began to realize that coming to this earth and gaining a body and experiencing life gave me the opportunity to prove myself worthy to return to Them."
To me, the most important statement she made was when she said, "and by receiving a witness through the Holy Ghost." You see, God still communicates to us this way. He hasn't forgotten about us or left us to seek after truth on our own. We all have that God-given gift to understand truth when it is presented to us. All we need to do is be sensitive enough and humble enough to feel those promptings from the Holy Spirit. This is the way God communicates to us and this is the only way we can understand spiritual truth.
As we know, truth cannot be argued nor debated. The results of this are evident as we see all of the different religions in the world claiming to be the only correct one. It is the Spirit of God that convinces one of truth and authenticity, not by arguing over dogma. This is vitally important to understand.
My friend continues on about the same challenge you have; "Was my earthly family asking me to deny my Heavenly pedigree? Yes, they were. Were they asking me to choose between what I had come to believe in my heart and them? Yes, they were. Did it hurt? Yes, very much. Did the Church tell me that my earthly parents were bad people? No. Did the Church teach me that my family was the most important thing in the world? Yes, they did. But the choice was mine to make, and I chose to listen to the still small voice within. It told me that I would be a 'light and a guide to those of 'my' lineage' (this is a quote from my Patriarchal blessing)."
"I think that it really all boils down to this; love, obedience and sacrifice brings forth the blessings of Heaven. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints does not want to come between families, but sometimes we must sacrifice even those things that we hold most dear, to do what is right. The Jewish Nation as a whole does not accept anyone else as being of Israel, and so to leave the faith for any other religion is to turn your back on your family and your Heritage. We all know that this isn't true, but this is a real perception for the Jews. This is how we have survived over the years of persecution. Who can blame us?"
God loves all tribes; all people in all dispensations of time. We have to understand that God didn't love the people of the Old Testament more than he loves us now. He is not a partial God who favors one person over another or one tribe of Israel over another. We are all his children. How can a parent be partial to one of his children and still be called a loving parent? It just isn't possible.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints firmly believes that the Family is the most important thing on earth. However, some families are separated by their faith. Let's take a look at the scriptures for a moment. In Matthew 19:27-30, it states:
"Then answered Peter and said unto him, Behold, we have forsaken all, and followed thee; what shall we have therefore? And Jesus said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That ye which have followed me, in the regeneration (resurrection) when the Son of man shall sit in the throne of his glory, ye also shall sit upon twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or FATHER, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundred fold, and shall inherit everlasting life. But many that are first shall be last; and the last shall be first." This scripture has tremendous meaning. The last verse, about the first being last is talking directly to the tribe of Judah, for it was Christ's mission to bring the gospel to what was left of Israel, or the tribe of Judah. After Christ was resurrected, He gave an open "mission call" to Peter that the Gospel could now be shared with the rest of the world.
Talk about a feeling of being forsaken and separated from His Father, notice how the Savior Himself felt: "And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?" Which is, being interpreted: My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? (Mark 15:34) In Psalm 22:1, David (who would be the loins from which the Savior would come forth) cried the same lament when he sang, "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? Why are thou so far from helping me, and the words of my roaring?" Isn't Judah the Lion? As David sang the lament, is he not speaking for all who would have to sacrifice for the better "way?"
You see, sometimes we have to give up the most precious things in life, even our families, if we are to take upon ourselves the cross, and walk with our Savior.
I suppose that sometimes the Gospel will separate us from those that we love, but it's only for a time. It is never the intention of the Church to divide families, but it does happen. Even in the best of families, where there is no problem with someone joining the Church, we are separated by what we believe, how we live, and the traditions of our upbringing.
Tradition is a funny thing, especially tradition within a strong culture. This makes it difficult for one to follow the desires and dictates of their heart when they recognize truth. If we look at the actual origins of what we consider to be sacred and divine traditions within our cultures, we would probably be surprised at when, where and how these traditions even got started. Wars have been fought, people have died, and family ties have been severed because of traditions and culture that sometimes we hold so dear.
I have an interesting saying that I call the "False T's"; Tradition + Time = Truth. We need to recognize the origins of the things we call truth. Are they traditions or are they of God? Only the spirit of God can guide us in finding out the difference.
As I have stated, The Gospel of Jesus Christ was not designed to split families apart, quite the contrary. It is to give us further light and knowledge so that we can remain together for eternity. We look way beyond the relationships of this earthly existence, way beyond the traditions that time has fashioned into truth. We believe that families can be together forever by virtue of the sealing power that binds them together for eternity and not just "till death do we part." Those sealing powers are once again restored and available to those who are willing to hear it and accept it. This is the same sealing power that Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Joseph enjoyed. The same blessings that Moses was willing to give to his posterity before realizing that the children of Israel were not ready to accept a higher law, so he instituted the lesser law, "The Law of Moses."
This law was fulfilled in Jesus Christ, not to split us apart, but to bring us together as one in salvation, exaltation and eternal life to all who would be willing to accept him. (see Numbers 15:15, Ezekiel 37:19, Ephesians 4:5)
Accepting Jesus Christ as the Messiah should not be construed as stepping away from the traditions of your Jewish community and should not be presumed, by any means, that you are stepping out of the bonds of family love. You must choose for yourself and let the spirit of God help you make that choice.
I hope this answers your question.
