| Question |
Regarding families: My family was not supportive in ways for me to attain faith in God, although I was exposed to religion and church through my
Grandmother - she did instill in me a faith that has not been shattered. My parents were divorced and my mother remarried - in short, my early
home life was not pleasant, it was abusive. I married young, before I understood what marriage was really about. I ended up marrying an
abusive man and 9 years later, divorced. Both of my parents have passed away, and my only sister is now living with my ex-husband. My
questions are about my marriage. I consider my ex-husband to be a very evil person with many ill intentions - how am I to relate to him now that
we are divorced, but share 3 children? I have searched the Bible for answers and found many that I agree with, but then I am faced with the laws
of our country (and state) which contradict what is best for me and my children.
I realize you are not a family counselor, but I am curious to know your feelings about this type of situation and whatever church doctrine your
church may have to support your feelings. I appreciate whatever response you can offer - after reading through your beliefs page and questions
& answers, I am seriously considering looking into the LDS church again as I did when I first heard of your religious beliefs.
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| Response |
We all find it very difficult to be charitable, Christ-centered, and compassionate to those who have hurt us as deeply as you
have been hurt. I will not say that I think it’s an easy thing to do, because it is not easy. I, myself, have been offended by
people from time to time, and it has not been easy to be forgiving and charitable toward them. One of the great challenges of
this life is to "overcome the world" and not be like other men and women. One great directive on this comes from Paul in his
epistle to Timothy (I Timothy 4:12), which invites us to "be thou an example of the believers," and then proceeds to list how
the "believers" would act. Then we read in I Cor. 13:4-7 about the great ideals of charity. Do I think these are easy virtues to
maintain? I don’t. But I strive every day to try and make them part of my life.
Your challenge is to be so kind, both outwardly and in your heart, so compassionate, so forgiving, that this man, who has
already done you so much harm, will have no excuse when he stands before the Lord to account for the quality of his life. By
your being this way, you will serve as a great blessing and example to your children, and as the months and years go by,
they will be able to draw the clearest comparison as to how their lives can be happy, and who it is that they love. In spite of
your hurt, don’t speak to your children or to anyone about the bitterness or hatred that you might feel toward this man. I
promise you that by so doing, the Lord will bless you for the goodness of your life, and all things will work together for your
best good.
Considering that you said you might want to look into the LDS Church again, may I invite a couple of our missionaries to call
on you and teach you again all we believe and why? I’m confident that you’ll find the time spent with them to be meaningful
and even life-changing. If I can help this way, please let me know your name and address, and I will have them call on you.
Sincerely,
Donny Osmond
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